Short Hair & Other Resolutions

We could all use a little change – Smashmouth

My hair is short today. At the beginning of the year, I had long extensions. They were removed in the Spring. My hair was then just past shoulder length. Not a bad length. But then I got obsessive about my gray hairs and decided to have it colored, then highlighted.

Between all the chemicals and heat styling, my hair started dying. Rapidly. So it had to be cut down. Oh, it will grow again. Maybe.

Oh, and the weight gain…caused another back injury. Just as I arrived in Ecuador. Most of my food goes bad because I buy too much anyway. But I continue to wake up in the middle of the night to sneak Oreos from the pantry. Why are there Oreos in my pantry?!!!

Laundry day has become an all-day event, prompting me to buy more clothes?! Am I the only one?

girl-2705518_640Outward Representations

They say the outward is a direct representation of the inward. This year has proven that statement to be quite fair. I have taken a long inventory of the excess in my life as of late. My physical being told a great story.

Weight (This one Really Hurts)

I had a back injury in 2016. In addition to treatment, I was put on a Ketogenic diet to lose 30 lbs. This was a complete success throughout late 2016 and all of 2017. I felt better than I had in years!

But then, I thought I could have a cookie in 2018…Mind you, I had just begun a new relationship with a wonderful man and lost my soulmate (my dog, Chewy). So much emotion – and this will be another topic in the Shedding the Excess Process.

Because emotion plays right into eating habits for me, by the end of  2018 I had gained 15 of those pounds back. Now that doesn’t seem like much but let me tell you, I injured my back again. Additionally, heartburn and burning mouth syndrome have returned.

The solution to this: Find another healthy eating program. One in which I can afford. I decided upon HIITBURN after completing their questionnaire. For $97.00, I get a personal coach. This is extremely helpful since I travel a lot and cannot go into a clinic for weigh-ins.

Frontpet Pet Carriers


Home

My house in Colorado was difficult to give up. So many memories. My son wanted to buy it to raise my granddaughters in the home they knew so well. Unfortunately, he could not come up with the money in time and my ex-husband was wanting his money.

This proved to be a blessing in disguise. The house did hold many moments in time. And it was time to let those moments go. Just as I had said goodbye to Chewy, I needed to say goodbye to the home I raised him within.

Again, this was an emotional process. I had already minimized so much and moved into an RV. But there was more.

How many of us hold on to a cluttered home because we just cannot let go of the dead energy that we know so well. There is safety in the familiar. I had learned this when I got sober. I had learned this when I got divorced.

I realized that I did not want the responsibility of a mortgage. I didn’t even want the responsibility of digging in roots anymore. It’s time to travel the world. It’s my time. And, it’s time to own it.

House sold.

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SHOES!!

Okay, I have a love-hate relationship with shoes. But especially boots. I have been stalked by shoes and boots on Facebook. But alas, I have no room for all the shoes that I once owned. Furthermore, I don’t need all of them!

Clothes

When I am in my new landing spot in West Texas, I dread laundry day. Packing for my long-term trips around the world is a nightmare.

I had a flannel shirt for 15 years. It served me well until the holes could no longer be mended. After which, trying to find that perfect flannel again took another 15 years. I remember a conversation with my favorite pair of white pants when I was 16. “Okay, I am giving you one more chance to make it right. I’m going to wash you with bleach and if you are still pink when you come out, it’s off to the Segunda for you!”. They came out white again…

I downsized my wardrobe twice in 2018 and have concluded that I need to do this again. But clothing also has an emotional connection. This item was a gift, this other item was something I wore on a special day. How can I hold on to these memories while letting go of the piece of clothing that means so much to me?

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Yoga Practice

How can one practice Yoga too much? When it starts to lean more on either aspect – the physical/spiritual. Yoga burn-out is real. It happens. It was happening to me. Just after a great year of taking two additional Yoga Teacher Trainings.

It was time to change it up. I had no choice but to do so when I injured my back. Taking a look at the many different practices:

  • Hatha
  • Iyengar
  • Restorative
  • Yin
  • Kundalini

I landed back on Kundalini because, though it can be physical, it is also less stressful on the back for some reason. I found a lovely 40-day Kundalini for weight loss program. What I started to see as a continual topic through this program was “Shedding the Excess”.


This is just a small piece of the pie. (oh, I want pie).  There’s much more excess to cut:


People are flocking to the Minimalist Movement. But do they really know why it is so appealing? Do they understand the philosophy behind this movement? Or is this just another pop-cultural thing to do? Another “Shiny Object” to play with for a while?

For me, it has become a new prana. The only way to truly breathe now. And I realized this when I looked in the mirror and saw that my hair is short today.

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Because Growth

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Another year on this Earth and I am reflecting on growth.  How I have learned to move on from childish and selfish behavior. The blame game has gotten old.

I once asked a friend  how to stop playing emotional games when I had been playing them most of my life. She replied “By reminding yourself that no one wins at these games. If you can’t win, you are less interested in playing”.  This proved to be one of the most valuable pieces of advice I had ever followed.


So here are a few of my growth points:

Because growth-PA-EVALDIVIA8
I respect my mother instead of blaming her.

Because growth.

I don’t play emotional games with people anymore.

Because growth.

I eat off a plate instead of straight from a can.

Because growth.

I no longer refer to my ex-husband as “Satan”

Because growth.

I enjoy vegetables instead of dropping them on the floor for the dogs to eat.

Because growth.

I sew new buttons on an old shirt instead of throwing it away

Because growth.

I understand constructive criticism is given to me out of love and not hate.

Because growth.

I don’t think the world is against me anymore.

Because growth.

I’m wearing clothes that fit me these days.

Because growth.

I’m not afraid to dance, lest I look like a fool

Because growth.

I have ceased to break things when I am angry.

Because growth.


Have you taken a look at your growth points lately? You ‘d probably be amazed at what you find. It is true that what is so important to us today will most likely not matter at all a year from now. Slowing down is a good thing. The impulse buys might not make sense next week.

It is a good practice to use a wish list and not act upon it for a full seven days. After which, you may decide that you are not interested in the item anymore.

I remember I was infuriated at another woman a few years ago. I ran to my car to head over to her place and…what? Maybe tell her off, maybe do something else that I might have regretted. My son just happened to pull into my driveway to ask me a question. I annoyingly gave him an answer. Then he asked me for a cigarette. I handed him one. He then asked if he could have the pack. I tossed it to him. At that moment, he looked me in the eye and said “Mom, whatever you are about to do, DON’T”.  I stopped, took a breath and nodded my head.  Years later, I am glad I listened to him. Because none of what was going on then is at all of essence to me today. I don’t even smoke anymore.

This birthday has been quite relaxing. I am indeed partying like a 46-year old.  No longer needing a whole week-long event with very little sleep. Quite the opposite. A good Yoga practice, nice lunch and a walk followed by a nap. Ha! Sounds boring? I will take my boring life over the drama-filled  one I once lived.

Tonight’s gift is a moment spent out on the deck,  watching the Aspen leaves flicker in the breeze and gazing upon the crescent moon in the  coolness of a dark evening as Autumn approaches.  This is what matters to me now.  Reading a book while soaking in the tub and drinking a cup of tea. This is real life.

On this my birthday, I do not ask for presents. Instead, I wish you all these very  gifts of Peace and Serenity.  Because Growth.

Stay Blissful My Friends! – E